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…I flatlined for two minutes, I’m told, I saw only darkness: no beckoning light, tunnel, etc. Later I asked Pastor Heidi, “Should I be concerned?” Her rejoinder: “What was the temperature?” Hmm, no recollection of flames at my feet, so the matter was deemed theologically inconclusive: could be going either way.
Seriously, there’s been a lot of grace and mercy in my life of late, for which I am truly and deeply grateful to the Lord. Survival rate of a Sudden Cardiac Arrest (SCA) is 10%, but that morning at LA Fitness (with my racquetball buddy, Leo Muller), EMT-trained staff and an AED-savvy flight attendant just “happened” to be there and did what needed doing until the Medic One brigade arrived.
On a 50/50 coin flip, I was the beneficiary of an experimental hypothermia therapy which undoubtedly helped preserve what’s left of my already declining cerebral horsepower. Two procedures and five days later, I exited the all-inclusive Northwest Hospital Resort and Spa and was back at work full-time the next day. Again, plenty of material here for thanksgiving.
Plus, the prayers, support, and affirming good wishes of friends from Bethany and around the world…wow, what a blessing!
As for spiritual growth and lessons learned, having been to the pearly gates and back, I think Nancy had hoped for upgraded spousal sanctification. Sorry. But I’d say my fear/uneasiness about leaving this mortal coil has diminished significantly (“Been there, done that!”), what time I have left on the clock is indeed an “extra innings” bonus, and I’m generally okay (though with undisputed room for improvement) with how I’m investing the time I have in family, church, and work.
"Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, [we] ought to say, 'If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.’” James 4:14-15 [NIV]
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David Dying
by Nancy White Carlstom
When you were so close to death,
your heart not pumping,
your lungs not working,
I was drinking coffee,
a double tall latte -
yes, an unusual indulgence -
and scanning Thursday’s paper.
The phone rang.
It was your racquetball buddy Leo
saying you had an incident
but everything was okay
the medics were there
and to which hospital
should they take you?
I wondered why he was so shaken
I was very calm.
Now that I know
you were actually dead and came back
and are in the 10 % that survive
a sudden cardiac arrest,
now that I understand
that just about anywhere else
it could have happened
your memorial service would already be over,
I am not calm.
I am nervous.
I watch you closely
through the day
and ask you too many times
how you are feeling.
I listen to your breathing at night
and try not to think about
your lifeless body lying on the gym floor.
We never know how close to death we come
in an ordinary day, or week or month.
But you know and I know
and now
God, help me to learn how to live with that.
Our days are like the grass. . .
But the merciful goodness of the Lord endures forever.
- from Psalm 103
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There's been a lot of grace and mercy in my life of late.
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BETHANY PRESBYTERIAN CHURCH